Why you can—and should—be particular

My maternal grandmother, my Mama Doe, gave me the best dating advice I have ever heard. She simply says to “be particular.” How genius is that? Just be particular—do not settle. Honestly, this applies to about every situation one may come upon in life. Looking for a job? Be particular. Applying to college? Be particular. Buying a car? Be particular. But this especially applies when dealing with the battlefield that is interacting with the opposite sex.

Honey, you are worth more than gold, and if your man treats you as less than that—well you aren’t being particular enough. This is when you put on your big girl panties and say on to the next one. Think about it, if we were as particular about our men as we are the wings on our eyeliner—how high would the standards be for our boyfriends and husbands?

While attention from the opposite sex may seem flattering, it will not be fulfilling unless he is pursuing your heart. Psalm 37:3-4 says, “Trust in the Lord and do good; dwell in the land and enjoy safe pasture. Take delight in the Lord, and he will give you the desires of your heart.” When you set your eyes on Jesus everything else will fall into place. But, do you know what makes this news even better? God knows our hearts even better than we do; He knows every tear we have cried and every laugh we have shared. He knows the deepest desires of our hearts and what needs to happen to further His kingdom. He will do what is best for us, even if we can’t see it in the moment. Ecclesiastes 3:11 says, “He has made everything beautiful in its time. He has also set eternity in the human heart; yet no one can fathom what God has done from beginning to end.” God’s timing is absolutely perfect—we just need to remain faithful through every season we find ourselves in, knowing He has something better planned. This can be a tough pill to swallow, especially as a to-do list lover like myself. My God is bigger than any obstacle I face, and He will work everything according to His will—and His timing, not mine.

We need to begin looking at ourselves as worthy to be pursued, rather than “lucky” to receive attention. We Southern women know the only man who will save us (or could save us) is Jesus, but we also know that the quality of the other men in our life will be determined by the standards we set for them and for ourselves. You are beautiful, you are worthy to be pursued, and you are a Daughter of the King—now get out there and start being “particular.” To attract a prince, think of yourself as no less than a princess, honey.

2 thoughts on “Why you can—and should—be particular

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Google photo

You are commenting using your Google account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s

%d bloggers like this: